Knee Surgery 101: Final Pre-Op; The Visit of 1,000 Questions, & the Sub-Zero

GEORGETOWN BOOT CAMP. I STARTED AT AGE 60, AND SEALED THE FATE OF MY KNEES. (BUT IT WAS FUN)

Yes, you go to the final pre-op with a long list of questions and maybe get to about 1/3 of them, if that. Because, face  it, you are on board with this now. What possibly could the doctor tell you that would make you jump off the examining table, land with your full weight on those creaky old knees, swallow the first shock of pain, and march out, hollering, "I'm keeping them."

Its tough. You're conflicted. That's sane. But its also sane when you listen to his logical answers to those 20 questions you actually ask and settle into some mature resolve. 

What were mine?

Can I wear stilettos again? Well, not exactly stilettos, but can I wear a feminine maybe 2-inch heel because this living in flat shoes is becoming tedious. 

Answer: Yes, most likely. (I mean people get TKR and run marathons. All I want is to walk and wear a feminine shoe.) If I have to live in flat shoes forever I'll do it, but geez I'd like to get back into something with an ankle strap and toe cleavage.  I'd also like to put on my walking shoes and walk 5-6 miles, easy. 

I had several questions about the surgery process. I'm not keen on getting drugged and knocked out and not able to use my cell phone. I can't imagine how they will pull it from my hands. I want to both have the surgery and make an Insta story. (Emily Bowman, you're needed in the OR). But, seriously, we talked about new anesthesia techniques and new prosthesis. Folks, don't bring me no bad news.

I told him I get email. I get volunteered opinions. Don't do this. Don't do that. Make sure you aren't having this, having that. I can find a person to cite a fault with every single TKR technique. I'm grateful for the input. I'm a research geek and I like information, but when it comes to something medical there's a point when us Type A paranoid control freaks have to give a little. I'm opting to go with what my doctor recommends. If you end up right and I'm wrong, well, you win. (I don't want you to win). Nonetheless, the doc and I went through some details that were both daunting and encouraging.

Also, in fairness, I hear lots of success stories, too, and I'm grateful for every friend and acquaintance and stranger who offers up a solid example that makes me feel I can get through this.

The Sub Zero question. I volunteered that I have a 25 year old Sub Zero refrigerator. It still works like a charm. The doctor said he had the same brand of fridge. I said I would like my new knees to be the Sub Zero of knees. 

My last (I hope) blood draw was this morning and let me just say a good phlebotomist is a gift to mankind. Its an art form and most technicians aren't Picassos with the pin prick. My GP has a Picasso at his office. The hospital does not, but she was dear and sweet and concerned when I yelped. But hospitals aren't boutiques, they are medical malls, and I fear with the training and salaries to match. But its done. Hoping for the best when the IV needle goes in.

Got home this evening and sat for a bit with the friend who is a seasoned heart surgeon. I prattled on. He smiled. "You're scared, aren't you?" Well, damn it. Yes. I am.